Real Men Feel: Ep. 158, The Coolest Part About Trauma

The Coolest Part About Trauma Episode 158, November 19, 2019

Attorney and coach, Stephen Sainato, joins us to share his journey through trauma and addiction into freedom, as well as the importance of vulnerability and being willing to feel all of your emotions.

“I was too afraid to share my emotions with anyone.” ~ Stephen Sainato

Stephen shares his potent story of surviving very dark times using alcohol and drugs in attempts to prevent himself from feeling. The conversation touches on spirituality, vulnerability, fear, judgment, suffering in silence, and ultimately seeing the gifts in our harshest of trials and creating a stronger self and plenty of space for freedom, expression, and service. I loved this conversation and you will too.

Topics and Questions Include:

(1:39) What is the coolest part about trauma?
(3:18) At what age did you get involved with drugs and alcohol?
(5:30) Were you consciously choosing to numb your feelings?
(6:19) Why do you think men suffer in silence?
(6:58) What is that fear about emotional pain?
(8:12) What showed you that your solution wasn’t a solution?
(12:15) Until that point, had you been a spiritual or religious person?
(13:10) Was recovery as instantaneous as your moment of clarity?
(16:23) How did life unfold once you were clean?
(20:21) Did you have a mindset prior to cultivating an empowering one?
(21:37) Why did it feel dangerous to be vulnerable?
(23:05) How did it come to be you were willing to share openly?
(25:23) Do you know focus on helping people with addiction issues?
(26:22) What is it about the coaching relationship that is so beneficial?
(30:06) The hardest things to say.
(31:44) What does masculinity even mean?
(35:08) Was the fear of judgment more the judgment of others or your own judgment of yourself?
(37:35) When you were in your darkest places, did you see any man expressing themselves?
(38:22) How did you make the shift from fearing the judgment to wanting to be open?
(40:24) What are you looking forward to regarding your freedom and expression?
(41:11) What do you want to create?
(42:53) What is the Live Fully summit?
(49:27) What happens when men don’t feel?
(50:36) Can you share a habit, practice, program, or book that has helped you?
(52:25) What are you proud of?
(53:17) How do you work with clients?
(54:41) Is there anything else you want more people to be aware of?