Real Men Feel: Ep. 75, Reactions to Sexual Harassment, #MeToo and #TimesUp

Real Men Feel: Reactions to Sexual Harassment, #MeToo and #TimesUp Episode 75, January 9, 2018

This week Andy Grant and Appio Hunter lead their second open call to discuss the tsunami of sexual harassment charges and the aftermath. Last month the discussion was among five men, this time we opened the call up to women as well.

Since our first conversation, sexual misconduct charges have swept the ESPN, NFL Network, Celebrity chefs, the New York City Ballet, London’s Royal Philharmonic … it has only been three months since the first accusations against Harvey Weinstein were made public. This is so far beyond any industry or workplace. This is impacting every part of society.

Director Morgan Spurlock owned up to his past bad behavior before any public accusations were made because of the anxiety he felt waiting for him to become the next man down. In the last month, Al Franken has left the Senate, and Roy Moore lost his bid to join the Senate.

We being by discussing what will society look like once the backlash calms down with Kenny Earl, Boysen Hodgson, and Lori Grant. What might the new standard be once we reach a balance point? It will probably be once women realize harassment is no longer happening, but how long will it take? Might sexual harassment be as antiquated as an 8-track tape someday?


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The conversation touches on the toxicity of social media, Sebastian Junger’s book Tribe, the notion of men not being evolved, and the entrenchment of patriarchy (not only among men).

The problem isn’t men in power. It is so many broken men in power. ~Andy Grant

One suggestion for men to realize how pervasive sexual harassment is for one day at work do not say something to a woman that you wouldn’t say to another guy.

Our lone female participant did not appreciate using the term backlash for men who have raped and assaulted women. Raping someone twenty years ago, but not having it come out until today doesn’t make it okay.

That’s not backlash, that’s fricking justice – Lori Grant

If you haven’t seen Oprah’s speech at the Golden Globes, it is worth watching. And if you have seen it, it’s worth watching again.
https://www.facebook.com/oprahmagazine/videos/10150951415064944/

Men, we need you to be phenomenal.

phe·nom·e·nal/fəˈnämənəl/ — adjective

  • 1. very remarkable; extraordinary: “the town expanded at a phenomenal rate” synonyms: remarkable, exceptional, extraordinary, amazing, astonishing, … more antonyms: ordinary
  • 2. perceptible by the senses or through immediate experience: “the phenomenal world.”

Resources and References

Justin Baldoni – Why I’m Done Trying To Be Man Enough

Vanity Fair – Brotopia: Silicon Valley Secretive Orgiastic Inner Sanctum

Men Accused Since Weinstein

Learn more about Time’s Up and add your name to the Letter of Solidarity.

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Times Up

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RMF 72, Real Men React: The Onslaught of Sexual Harassment Charges

Real Men React to Sexual Harassment, Episode 72, December 5, 2017

With the depth and speed of sexual harassment charges, firings, apologies, denials etc. RMF has been wanting a discussion with other men to talk about our reactions to all of this. Andy’s has continually been; “What the fuck?!”

Real Men Feel’s Andy Grant and Appio Hunter, lead a frank discussion with three guys from the private RMF Facebook Group; Anthony Simeone from Gen X Men podcast, Boysen Hodgson of the MankindProject, & Kenny Earl of his own bad self.

This recent cycle began in early October with a New York Times investigation on accusations of sexual harassment and assault against movie producer, Harvey Weinstein dating back to 1990.

See Our Prior Show on Sexual Harassment

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MeToo
Photo by Mihai Surdu on Unsplash

No More Sexual Harassment

 

Real Men Feel

Real Men Feel: Episode 70, Sexual Harassment

Sexual Harassment, Episode 70, October 17, 2017

With the unfolding sexual harassment scandal of Harvey Weinstein and the viral rush of #MeToo social media posts with both men and women admitting to experiencing sexual harassment, Real Men Feel’s Andy Grant and Appio Hunter, have an open discussion on sexual harassment with special guest, Andy’s wife, Lori Grant.

What is sexual harassment? How do men take part in harassment without realizing it? What can men do to change their own behavior or the behavior of harassers?

Sexual Harassment

US Equal Opportunity Commission
It is unlawful to harass a person (an applicant or employee) because of that person’s sex. Harassment can include “sexual harassment” or unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical harassment of a sexual nature.

Harassment does not have to be of a sexual nature, however, and can include offensive remarks about a person’s sex. For example, it is illegal to harass a woman by making offensive comments about women in general.

Both victim and the harasser can be either a woman or a man, and the victim and harasser can be the same sex.

Although the law doesn’t prohibit simple teasing, offhand comments, or isolated incidents that are not very serious, harassment is illegal when it is so frequent or severe that it creates a hostile or offensive work environment or when it results in an adverse employment decision (such as the victim being fired or demoted).

The harasser can be the victim’s supervisor, a supervisor in another area, a co-worker, or someone who is not an employee of the employer, such as a client or customer.

The Rock Test: Treat all women like you would treat Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.
Even better, imagine that what you are doing (or considering doing) is being done to you mother, partner, sister or daughter (friend, loved one, pet…). Would you be upset? If yes, Stop It!

References:

Sexual Harassment: 5 Essential Reads

Weinstein Lesson: Lot to Lose, Little to Gain by Reporting Sex Harassment

The Full List of Harvey Weinstein Accusers

Sexual Harassment on Wikipedia

#RealMenFeel

Like the show on Facebook facebook.com/realmenfeelshow

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Let us know what you thought here in the comments or shoot an email to realmenfeel@gmail.com

MeTooPhoto by Mihai Surdu on Unsplash

No More Sexual Harassment

 

Real Men Feel