Real Men Feel: Episode 70, Sexual Harassment

Sexual Harassment, Episode 70, October 17, 2017

With the unfolding sexual harassment scandal of Harvey Weinstein and the viral rush of #MeToo social media posts with both men and women admitting to experiencing sexual harassment, Real Men Feel’s Andy Grant and Appio Hunter, have an open discussion on sexual harassment with special guest, Andy’s wife, Lori Grant.

What is sexual harassment? How do men take part in harassment without realizing it? What can men do to change their own behavior or the behavior of harassers?

Sexual Harassment

US Equal Opportunity Commission
It is unlawful to harass a person (an applicant or employee) because of that person’s sex. Harassment can include “sexual harassment” or unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical harassment of a sexual nature.

Harassment does not have to be of a sexual nature, however, and can include offensive remarks about a person’s sex. For example, it is illegal to harass a woman by making offensive comments about women in general.

Both victim and the harasser can be either a woman or a man, and the victim and harasser can be the same sex.

Although the law doesn’t prohibit simple teasing, offhand comments, or isolated incidents that are not very serious, harassment is illegal when it is so frequent or severe that it creates a hostile or offensive work environment or when it results in an adverse employment decision (such as the victim being fired or demoted).

The harasser can be the victim’s supervisor, a supervisor in another area, a co-worker, or someone who is not an employee of the employer, such as a client or customer.

The Rock Test: Treat all women like you would treat Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.
Even better, imagine that what you are doing (or considering doing) is being done to you mother, partner, sister or daughter (friend, loved one, pet…). Would you be upset? If yes, Stop It!

References:

Sexual Harassment: 5 Essential Reads

Weinstein Lesson: Lot to Lose, Little to Gain by Reporting Sex Harassment

The Full List of Harvey Weinstein Accusers

Sexual Harassment on Wikipedia

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MeTooPhoto by Mihai Surdu on Unsplash

No More Sexual Harassment

 

Real Men Feel

Real Men Feel: Episode 66, Reconnection

Real Men Feel Reconnection Episode 66, August 22, 2017

In this episode Andy Grant and Appio Hunter are together again for the first time in two months. Their planned guest couldn’t make it, so this week was a wide ranging coffee talk and reconnection show.

This is an open and authentic conversation that too many men don’t get to be part of. It is a sharing and supportive experience between friends. Topics include where the show has been, the eclipse, astrology, depression, grief, loss of fathers, questioning being a good friend, all or nothing thinking, release, and discovery.

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Reconnection

 

 

Real Men Feel: Episode 65, Real Men Can Feel Suicidal

Real Men Can Feel Suicidal Episode 65, August 18, 2017

Real Men Feel host Andy Grant goes solo again to share some personal insights as well as a few tools for dealing with depression and negative or suicidal thinking.

Andy opens up regarding some recent conversations, discoveries, admissions and rationalizations. He also shares three simple yet powerful tools that anyone can use to help deal with negative or suicidal thinking. The tools include pivoting, witnessing and expressing.

Life is meant to be simple and enjoyed. Make choices that result in you enjoying life more.

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Real Men Can Feel Depressed

Real Men Feel: Episode 63, From Warrior to Healer with Mike Marschhausen

Warrior to Healer

From Warrior to Healer with Mike Marschhausen, Episode 63, June 6, 2017

This week on Real Men Feel, Andy Grant and Appio Hunter are joined by co-founder and healer at SpiritualityForMen.com, Mike Marschhausen. Mike shares his story of growth and discovery from military combat in Afghanistan to a spiritual awakening in Mexico.

Mike tells how someone offering an energy healing for his dog started him on his journey to becoming a healer himself. Now he wants to bring spirituality and energy work to more men. Spirituality For Men is all about helping men to navigate their inner realm.

Drop the warrior. Why recreate war in your life?

We all have a warrior within us, but that doesn’t mean we need to fight and struggle to utilize it. Mike, Andy & Appio all share various experiences with energy work, emotions, fears and shadows.

Connect with Mike on Facebook: facebook.com/spiritualityformenofficial

Visit SpiritualityForMen.com

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Real Men Feel: Episode 61, Finding Hope with Psychological Theorist, Vito Mucci

Finding Hope with Psychological Theorist, Vito Mucci Episode 61, May 23, 2017

This week on Real Men Feel, Andy Grant and Appio Hunter are joined by author and co-host of Divine Union TV, Vito Mucci, to talk about finding hope. This isn’t airy-fairy stuff. Vito is all about science and psychology for everybody as he shares lessons learned from spending eight years at rock bottom.

Andy shares how triggered he was when first coming across Vito on Facebook. Vito then describes what being a psychological theorist means to him. The bulk of the show is about Vito’s eight years of being at rock bottom and attempting to use alcohol to control his emotions.

“Life is pretty adept at beating us down.” ~Vito Mucci

Vito believes alcohol did indeed save his life. He longed for some way to feel safe and alcohol was that safety for a long time. Drinking gave him a sense of control over his emotions.

The beginning of hope comes from not denying our emotions, but in allowing them.

Validate and celebrate all your little successes, those are the embers of hope.

Check out Vito’s book Coffee for Consciousness.

Connect with Vito on Facebook: facebook.com/vito.mucci
facebook.com/Divine-Union-TV-263163274114518/

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Real Men Feel: Episode 59, The Good Athlete Project with Jim Davis

Real Men Feel - Good Athlete Project

The Good Athlete Project with Jim Davis Episode 59, May 9, 2017

This week on Real Men Feel, Appio Hunter is joined by Jim Davis, founder of The Good Athlete Project, to discuss the power of using sports in character and leadership development.

Jim Davis is a high school staff and student wellness director in Illinois as well as being an athlete, artist, poet, writer and founder of The Good Athlete Project. Jim is passionate about athletics and the arts and shatters so many stereotypes about being a “jock.” Jim doesn’t subscribe to any stereotypes, be it jock, artist, man or anything. Stereotypes, at the most basic level, are lazy thinking. At their worst level they are hateful and dangerous.

Jim explores the metaphor of an anchor and tether. What anchors someone is their absolute belief in an area of life and how much wiggle room there is. If we find out we’re wrong, we need to be willing and able to pick up and move our anchor.

“Be sure you put your feet in the right place, then stand firm.” ~Abraham Lincoln

Jim also shares his path to bringing the Good Athlete Project into the world. As an athlete he did his best to influence and be good for his teammates. Then he pursed that positive influence as a coach, and then expanded that to coach other coaches to meet the needs of more students, and now scaling that model even further espousing character, culture, equity and service.

“Competing is showing off all the good work you’ve done.” ~ Jim Davis

The Good Athlete Project is an international, sports-based, non-profit focused on outreach, leadership training and research. The goal is maximizing athletics as an educational platform. Sports gone wrong is something that fuels Jim. The notion of “locker room” talk and similar poor outcomes of athletics. Sports has the power of momentum, and the Good Athlete Project wants to get in front of stigma inducing behavior.

Being tough does not mean talking tough or degrading women. We made up what “tough” looks like and we can remake it. Ideally there is no barrier to how much we can care about each other.

“If you are part of a team, you should never feel like there is no one to talk to.”~ Jim Davis

The interview wraps up with an interesting discussion on concussions and chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE).

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Learn more about the Good Athlete Project at – GoodAthleteProject.com

Connect with Good Athlete Project (coach4kindness) on Twitter or Instagram.

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Real Men Feel: Episode 57, Breaking The Vow of Male Silence with Nige Atkinson

Real Men Feel

Breaking The Vow of Male Silence with Nige Atkinson Episode 57, April 25, 2017

This week on Real Men Feel, Andy Grant and Appio Hunter are joined by Odd Man Out author, Nige Atkinson, to explore the vow of silence among men, the toll it takes, and how we might break that vow.

Nige shares his story of feeling uncomfortable in his own skin from a very young age including sexual abuse, anxiety, anger, rage and the male vow of silence that kept it all building and terrifying. He was taught that tears and emotions were signs of weakness. The vow of male silence is “man up, shut up, and put up” and it is killing men. There is power and healing in breaking the silence and sharing your fears.

“When you break the vow of male silence, you don’t do it just once. You have to break it again and again and again.” ~Nige Atkinson

Nige’s path includes everything from The Incredible Hulk to A Course in Miracles. His upcoming book, Odd Man Out: Breaking The Vow of Male Silence, is for men who want to know more about themselves—especially those men who are quietly struggling and suffering in silence—and for women who are struggling to understand their men.

“Real men cry.” ~Nige Atkinson

To prove that sentiment, Nige and Appio pile praise onto Andy towards the end of this episode and move him to tears.

See the first chapter of Odd Man Out: Breaking The Vow of Male Silence.

This is the Step Class Video of mine that Nige mentions.

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Real Men Feel: Episode 54, Male Rites of Passage with Journeymen Founder, Nicky Wilks

Real Men Feel

Male Rites of Passage with Nicky Wilks, Episode 54, April 4, 2017

This week on Real Men Feel, Andy Grant and Appio Hunter are joined by the founder of Journeymen.us, Nicky Wilks, to talk about the need for rituals, ceremonies and rites of passage for creating better men. Nicky shares his man story, and there is a great discussion around mentorship and initiation.

Journeymen’s vision is to regenerate modern society through the inspiration of young men, and Nicky is indeed inspiring while sharing some of his goals for Journeymen and The Quest they offer teenage boys. A popular theme in Real Men Feel is authenticity, and it is oozing out of Nicky and all that Journeymen is up to.

If you think building compassionate and inspired men through nature-based rites of passage, long-term mentoring, and community engagement is something that is sorely needed, you are going to love this show, Nicky, and Journeymen.

“Mentorship is 95% showing up authentically and 5% choosing to do it again the next time.” ~Nicky Wilks

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Connect with Nicky at Journeymen.us

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Real Men Feel: Episode 52, Awakened Journeys for Men with Jonathan Hermida

Real Men Feel

Awakened Journeys for Men with Jonathan Hermida, Episode 52, March 21, 2017

This week on Real Men Feel, Andy Grant and Appio Hunter are joined by Men’s transformational coach, Jonathan Hermida, to discuss transformative adventures for men and share his own journey of awakening. A journey that took him from feeling insecure and uncomfortable in his own skin to being a globe-trotting coach, willing to drop the destructive mask of masculinity. Listen and learn about a fantastic opportunity to visit Machu Picchu, Peru as well!

“The mask of masculinity is a most destructive force for guys. We are preening peacocks, but crumbling inside.” ~ Jonathan Hermida

Jonathan’s recommended book, The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer

Learn more about The Awakening Man: Journey Through the Sacred Valley trip to Peru this August.

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Real Men Feel: Episode 50, Internalized Homophobia

Real Men Feel

Internalized Homophobia, Episode 50, March 7, 2017

This week on Real Men Feel, Andy Grant and Appio Hunter discuss the concept and share experiences of internalized homophobia. Thanks to an organic gathering of live listeners the perspectives of straight, gay and bisexual men are expressed.

Key topics include; that the put-down of “gay” has nothing to do with sexuality and is all about making someone feel “less” of a man, the notion of separation along many different attributes, and the fact that we are really of one race, the human race.

We also talk about how easy it is to mock a label or term you don’t understand, and that so many issues of attacking an “other” comes from a lack of self-love.

The backstory of this episode can be found in this post – Why Does Being Called ‘Gay’ Bother Me?

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