Real Men Feel: Ep. 268, Not Allowed to Die | Paws For Patrick

Not Allowed to Die | Paws For Patrick Episode 268, August 26, 2022

My guest, Dan Maigler, shares his journey from politics to lobbying, to counseling, always knowing he wanted to help people. The kids that Dan works with reminded me of myself a lot. Some of the things they express resonated deeply with me.

Fair Warning: This is an open conversation on suicidal thoughts and attempts. If you are in crisis, call or chat 988 right now.

Dan is the mental health director for Paws for Patrick, a non-profit organization that connects young people with mental health issues to emotional support animals. He is also a school social worker, a therapist in private practice, and the host of the podcast Not Allowed to Die, where he explores the dilemmas he sees clients facing in his work.

We discuss topics such as contracting for safety, assessing the risk of depressed clients, and being manipulative to keep people alive. Our conversation also touches on the difference between wanting to die and wanting the pain to stop.

“I don’t care what you do to get through the day. You just aren’t allowed to die.”
Dan Maigler

Topics and Questions

1:18 What age range of kids do you work with as a school social worker?
1:59 What got you interested in mental health work?
3:11 Did you meet politicians out to help people, but they got jaded?
4:23 You have a podcast called, Not Allowed to Die, which is one of my all-time favorite titles — tell me the significance of that name.
6:28 Have you had kids that couldn’t make that commitment? That they aren’t allowed to die?
8:16 So glad kids today can openly discuss suicidal thoughts.
9:55 Do you ever talk to teens on Not Allowed to Die?
10:31 What prompted you to start the podcast?
12:13 Do you worry about your family’s mental health history impacting your two sons?
15:50 What is contracting for safety?
18:06 Andy’s experiences with promising to live.
19:30 Why Dan wants you to stay alive.
21:09 Parasuicide attempts. An attempt that would not be lethal.
23:11 The diminishing of people’s feelings, especially men.
27:15 What does life promise us?
28:24 What is Paws for Patrick?
31:27 Dan, what’s the best way to find out more about you, Not Allowed to Die and Paws for Patrick?
32:40 Is there one thing you wish more men knew?